I'm useless.

What can I say? It doesn't fit above, put it here. Also the location of board rules/info.
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Re: I'm useless.

Post by Tanni » 16 Jul 2016 09:58

Chagen wrote: So, going back to the Fall 2015 semester. I had to pay off that semester's tuition fully in order to go to my spring 2016 semester, right? Well, yes, and I did. Or so I thought. See, apparently there were some fees my school just forgot to charge me. I'm not editorializing this: the way the financial aid advisor said it (he was slightly unclear), the bureaucracy literally just never applied any fees to me. Since they forgot about them, I was allowed to go through to the spring 2016 semester, since in the eyes of their systems, I had paid off the fall 2015 semester fully.
This sounds very strange. Normally, universities charge semestral fees as a whole amount of money, where they put a list on their webpage telling you about what's behind the parts of this whole amount. This way, there never is additional claim. And it's all the same for every student.
So, when they realized this, they decided to stick all these "forgotten" fees behind my back on me. I was not informed of this AT ALL.
Most important question here: Are you the only one, or do you know of other students who have got the same problem?
Now, you might say "But Chagen, you are an adult and a college isn't obligated to inform you about everything". Well, you're right.
By using the word ''adult'', they can put the blame on you! The college may not be obligated to inform the students about some internal issues, but when it comes to the fees they have to pay, they just need to be informed, otherwise they can't pay it.
My neurochemistry has fucked my impulse control, now I'm diagnosed OOD = oppositional opinion disorder, one of the most deadly diseases in totalitarian states, but can be cured in the free world.

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Re: I'm useless.

Post by HoskhMatriarch » 04 Aug 2016 09:34

Well, here's what I would do:

1. Summon up all the willpower you can and Just Say No to the Abyss. There's a reason your hearts struggles violently against being cast into the void. If you yourself don't have the willpower emanating from within the core of your being, just borrow some from the environment and return it later when you have more.
2. Get off the drugs. It's basically just meth, and it doesn't seem to be really helping you anyways, since you often can't concentrate with them and can concentrate without them. I read several places that you should reduce at 10% (of the original dose) per week, not pull off them suddenly, or you'll just have bad withdrawal symptoms.
3. Do stuff to change your mindset. Here are some things you can do:

- Go out in nature, especially during a sunset, sunrise, thunderstorm (but be safe) or some other sort of spectacular event. Really contemplate nature, don't think about anything else.
- Listen to music, and again, really contemplate it. Classical music seems to work best, and the more dramatic it is the better, and it's probably also better if it's at least somewhat novel so you don't go like "not Ode to Joy again" and tune it out. I decided against posting some of my favorite ones here.
- Use various techniques to induce an altered state of consciousness. I can't recommend anything illegal or dangerous, so here's some things:

http://www.shamanshearth.com.au/20-musi ... -journeys/
http://www.meta-religion.com/Spirituali ... riment.htm
http://www.finerminds.com/metaphysical/ ... rojection/
http://m.wikihow.com/Perform-Mantra-Meditation
http://m.wikihow.com/Do-Mindful-Meditation

(Yes, meditating can put you in an altered state of consciousness, although no one wants you to know that.)

4. Go out and talk to people. In this you must be like a child, because you will most likely embarrass yourself. You must laugh at yourself, because while life may be a great struggle, it is also a great joke. If you really feel uncomfortable about yourself, just go cosplay or pretend to be someone from some faraway land or something.

Also, I would recommend that you take up exercise, or play Pokemon Go (which would give you exercise after you played it enough, and it's anime). You just need to get aus dem haus, mostly. You are not a disembodied mind, and you must take care of your physical parts and your social parts in order for your mind to work right.

I should probably not have spent so long typing this. Somehow my sympathy for people I don't even know is stronger than my desire for order, or to do anything productive for myself. Anyways, it's well into the witching hour here so I'll be off a while. I probably don't write as well into the unholy hours of the night and should've just waited until the morning.
No darkness can harm you if you are guided by your own inner light

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Re: I'm useless.

Post by elemtilas » 04 Aug 2016 14:57

HoskhMatriarch wrote:Well, here's what I would do:

2. Get off the drugs. It's basically just meth, and it doesn't seem to be really helping you anyways, since you often can't concentrate with them and can concentrate without them. I read several places that you should reduce at 10% (of the original dose) per week, not pull off them suddenly, or you'll just have bad withdrawal symptoms.
By in large, good advice. But don't do #2 without talking about this with your counsellor & doctor! (Forgive me Hoskh if you are a physician!), but I really do hate it when people who know fuck all about medications go around telling other people to get off this or go on that.

Generally speaking, being medication-free is a Good Thing and a state to strive for, but some people need medications for whatever issue it is they've got going on in their lives. I get the impression that Chagen is not being forced to take meds; and in fact it was himself who sought out help for his issues some while ago.

Rather than just getting off the drugs, if he isn't already, he needs to become an informed and proactive patient. He needs to know and understand his own body and what goes on with & without meds; he needs to understand his diagnosis and what that entails; he needs to understand and cooperate with his treatment plan and discuss alternatives with his providers; he needs to make his own informed decisions about his own care.
[/rant]
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Re: I'm useless.

Post by k1234567890y » 04 Aug 2016 15:08

It is said that green, natural environment is helpful in lessening the symptoms of ADHD, and it is said that natural environment is more helpful than medicine. Originally I didn't think so, because I saw it in an article written by a parenting writer whose theories I disagree a lot(actually, I disagree with parenting writers in general), however, I neverthless still searched related contents on Google, and I found what that writer had claimed has some scientific bases.

A research paper suggesting that natural environment can help to cure ADHD: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1448497/

maybe you really need to consider to go out and have a nice time with the mother nature, Chagen.
...

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Re: I'm useless.

Post by qwed117 » 04 Aug 2016 17:10

elemtilas wrote:
HoskhMatriarch wrote:Well, here's what I would do:

2. Get off the drugs. It's basically just meth, and it doesn't seem to be really helping you anyways, since you often can't concentrate with them and can concentrate without them. I read several places that you should reduce at 10% (of the original dose) per week, not pull off them suddenly, or you'll just have bad withdrawal symptoms.
By in large, good advice. But don't do #2 without talking about this with your counsellor & doctor! (Forgive me Hoskh if you are a physician!), but I really do hate it when people who know fuck all about medications go around telling other people to get off this or go on that.

Generally speaking, being medication-free is a Good Thing and a state to strive for, but some people need medications for whatever issue it is they've got going on in their lives. I get the impression that Chagen is not being forced to take meds; and in fact it was himself who sought out help for his issues some while ago.

Rather than just getting off the drugs, if he isn't already, he needs to become an informed and proactive patient. He needs to know and understand his own body and what goes on with & without meds; he needs to understand his diagnosis and what that entails; he needs to understand and cooperate with his treatment plan and discuss alternatives with his providers; he needs to make his own informed decisions about his own care.
[/rant]
elemtilas is right here. Even if he has to take amphetamines to control his ADHD, it is unreasonable, and dangerous to immediately remove it or even reduce it without notice from a doctor.
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Re: I'm useless.

Post by Tanni » 04 Aug 2016 17:44

Thank's Hoskh for your post and your recommendations. (The only thing I wouldn't recommend is to play Pokemon Go, which in fact is just a means of surveillance. According to Wikipedia, there were lot's of accidents, too. If someone likes to experience the great outdoors, then do it the classical way by wandering, walking or hiking.)
elemtilas wrote:By in large, good advice. But don't do #2 without talking about this with your counsellor & doctor!
Agree that you (Chagen) should first talk to your parents and then consult a non-psychiatric doctor to taper out of your medicaments.
(Forgive me Hoskh if you are a physician!), but I really do hate it when people who know fuck all about medications go around telling other people to get off this or go on that.
This kind of reaction just leads to nowhere. It wouldn't make it better if Hoskh were a physician, as then, it would be remote-counceling, which surely is not the best method of treating people.

Chagen made this thread to talk about his/her problems and to get advice or recommendations aside from professionals and doctors. In this case, we should be free to point him/her to what we think might be the problems. There is lots of evidence on the internet that medication like that can cause more harm than it ever will help, and it does not help him in any way if this information is kept away from him.

ADHD or unwanted alertness?
Ritalin for ADHD — Ineffective and harmful
The psychiatrization of society
Generally speaking, being medication-free is a Good Thing and a state to strive for, but some people need medications for whatever issue it is they've got going on in their lives. I get the impression that Chagen is not being forced to take meds; and in fact it was himself who sought out help for his issues some while ago.
Seeking out for help does not imply that you get the help you need, not even if you consult a doctor. It is very likely that, if you go to a normal docter, that you get a certain label (e.g. ADHD) and get prescribed the ''appropriate'' drugs called ''medication''. This is -- like it or not -- ''modern'' medicine: you go to a doctor and you EXPECT that you get medication -- and there it is. Sometimes, it would be more healthy to just get suggar pills, but they somehow need to reach the goals inscribed here.
Rather than just getting off the drugs, if he isn't already, he needs to become an informed and proactive patient
This is impossible if criticism on modern medicine and on possible side-effects of prescribed drugs is kept away from him.

Psychotropic drugs usually cause the diseases they should heal
Psychotropic drugs can lead to violence and suicide

Cell phone radiation can also cause problems:

Sickness from mobile phone radiation
ADHD and digital wireless transmissions are developing ...

US Health ministry in criminal hands
He needs to know and understand his own body and what goes on with & without meds; ...
Who knows and understands everything about his own body and what goes on with and without meds? Not even the doctors!
... he needs to understand his diagnosis and what that entails; ...
Have you ever considered that a diagnosis could be wrong?
... he needs to understand and cooperate with his treatment plan ...
If the diagnosis is wrong, cooperation with his treatment plan does not make sense. If meds don't help or if there is only little relief, one should consider that something is wrong with the diagnosis or with the meds. But some people tend to obey to the authorities, here the doctor, and that can cause tremendous harm to himself or the ones he is responsible for.
and discuss alternatives with his providers;
Wait, in Chagen's age, and with his medical background knowledge, someone is able to discuss alternatives with his providers?
he needs to make his own informed decisions about his own care.
See above.
Last edited by Tanni on 04 Aug 2016 18:58, edited 10 times in total.
My neurochemistry has fucked my impulse control, now I'm diagnosed OOD = oppositional opinion disorder, one of the most deadly diseases in totalitarian states, but can be cured in the free world.

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Re: I'm useless.

Post by Tanni » 04 Aug 2016 18:05

k1234567890y wrote:It is said that green, natural environment is helpful in lessening the symptoms of ADHD, and it is said that natural environment is more helpful than medicine. Originally I didn't think so, because I saw it in an article written by a parenting writer whose theories I disagree a lot(actually, I disagree with parenting writers in general), however, I neverthless still searched related contents on Google, and I found what that writer had claimed has some scientific bases.
Lol! It is common knowledge that bodily activities in natural environment enhance your health.
A research paper suggesting that natural environment can help to cure ADHD: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1448497/
Cursorly skimming over this article I got the impression that they -- guided by science -- reinvent the wheel again and again. Sorry for the people who need to pay them!
My neurochemistry has fucked my impulse control, now I'm diagnosed OOD = oppositional opinion disorder, one of the most deadly diseases in totalitarian states, but can be cured in the free world.

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Re: I'm useless.

Post by k1234567890y » 04 Aug 2016 18:29

Tanni wrote:
k1234567890y wrote:It is said that green, natural environment is helpful in lessening the symptoms of ADHD, and it is said that natural environment is more helpful than medicine. Originally I didn't think so, because I saw it in an article written by a parenting writer whose theories I disagree a lot(actually, I disagree with parenting writers in general), however, I neverthless still searched related contents on Google, and I found what that writer had claimed has some scientific bases.
Lol! It is common knowledge that bodily activities in natural environment enhance your health.
A research paper suggesting that natural environment can help to cure ADHD: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1448497/
Cursorly skimming over this article I got the impression that they -- guided by science -- reinvent the wheel again and again. Sorry for the people who need to pay them!
ok (: so sounds like research papers like this just confirms some well-known facts again ad again, even though it's like a cliche, doing so may help Chagen anyways.

unrelated, I still don't like those who write parenting articles in general.
...

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Re: I'm useless.

Post by Tanni » 04 Aug 2016 19:17

k1234567890y wrote:ok (: so sounds like research papers like this just confirms some well-known facts again ad again, even though it's like a cliche, doing so may help Chagen anyways.
Yes, it may help Chagen, at least if a sufficiently natural environment is on his reach.
unrelated, I still don't like those who write parenting articles in general.
Ok.
My neurochemistry has fucked my impulse control, now I'm diagnosed OOD = oppositional opinion disorder, one of the most deadly diseases in totalitarian states, but can be cured in the free world.

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Re: I'm useless.

Post by Tanni » 04 Aug 2016 19:35

HoskhMatriarch wrote: 2. Get off the drugs. It's basically just meth, and it doesn't seem to be really helping you anyways, since you often can't concentrate with them and can concentrate without them. I read several places that you should reduce at 10% (of the original dose) per week, not pull off them suddenly, or you'll just have bad withdrawal symptoms.
This should include the commonly used drugs, too.
3. Do stuff to change your mindset. Here are some things you can do:
- Go out in nature, especially during a sunset, sunrise, thunderstorm (but be safe) or some other sort of spectacular event. Really contemplate nature, don't think about anything else.
- Listen to music, and again, really contemplate it. Classical music seems to work best, and the more dramatic it is the better, and it's probably also better if it's at least somewhat novel so you don't go like "not Ode to Joy again" and tune it out. I decided against posting some of my favorite ones here.
I like these two. Did these by myself. I was out in the field or the forest in the evening or even at night, even on walks of several kilometers while it was dark.

You could also combine them by listening to music while walking. MP3-Players are much better then the CD-Player or the Walkman I used back then. I once experienced a thunderstorm in an open big barn where one leave the village into the field. The barn is now gone, alas.

- Use various techniques to induce an altered state of consciousness. I can't recommend anything illegal or dangerous, so here's some things:
Just use your fantasy right here, that's why I linked to the Labyrinth.
My neurochemistry has fucked my impulse control, now I'm diagnosed OOD = oppositional opinion disorder, one of the most deadly diseases in totalitarian states, but can be cured in the free world.

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Re: I'm useless.

Post by elemtilas » 04 Aug 2016 23:14

Tanni wrote:Thank's Hoskh for your post and your recommendations. (The only thing I wouldn't recommend is to play Pokemon Go, which in fact is just a means of surveillance. According to Wikipedia, there were lot's of accidents, too. If someone likes to experience the great outdoors, then do it the classical way by wandering, walking or hiking.)
Excellent advice, that!
Tanni wrote:
and discuss alternatives with his providers;
Wait, in Chagen's age, and with his medical background knowledge, someone is able to discuss alternatives with his providers?
Who better!?

Chagen is obviously an intelligent young man and has shown an interest in being evaluated and treated and has demonstrated a better awareness of self & knowledge of his own internal workings than many people. Yes, he is probably more qualified, given some good sources to research his condition and treatment options (whether they be medications or meditation or something else), than his Mom or certainly you or me to discuss his needs & issues & concerns with his providers. If they treat him to the two-minute-you've-got-ADHD-here's-your-script-have-a-nice-day routine, he is also intelligent and I'm sure informed enough to know that is nòt good medical practice and he should go elsewhere.

He is also intelligent enough to, with guidance from his providers, go off the meds if that is what he wants. That's his right. It then becomes his obligation, however, to seek some other treatment modality that will also offer good results.

And you're exactly right -- if the diagnosis is wrong, then his treatment will be wrong. You're also right that many people view doctors as godlings and will do whatever they say. That is them not being good patients! Especially as medicine advances, we all really need to become our own advocates for appropriate assessment, care and treatment.

I'm not at all interested in arguing with you about your views of medical care. What I am interested in is warning against well meaning but foolishly given medical advice.
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Re: I'm useless.

Post by Chagen » 09 Aug 2016 01:35

I think I've truly torpedoed my relationship with my mom.

She was doing my hair today and trying to manipulate my dad into spending money he doesn't have. I got pissed so I finally called her out on stealing 100 bucks from me. She got very indignant and started making up this bullshit about how she had a right to just steal my money (she didn't), that my dad let her take the 100 (complete lie, confirmed by him when he got home today), and that as my mother she doesn't have to answer for blatant theft of my funds. She also accused me of wanting to hoard that money to buy video games (I didn't--it was completely meant for getting school stuff done).

I got pissed at hell at being yelled at her and finally just said to her face that she was the most brazen piece of shit I have ever had the displeasure of dealing with. She lost it then and launched into an hour-long tirade about how I'm a narcissist piece of shit and she's some innocent angel being abused by me and my father. Since I was stuck there, she took the oppurtunity to gaslight me into thinking I'm the abuser and mentally fucked up (not very effective when I know she's bullshitting, though). Witness some near-direct quotations from my loving mother:

"Say that to me again and I'll hurt. I'm your mother. Disrespect me and I will slam you into the fucking ground".
"Next time you say that, I will cut you" (confirmed by her to be an actual physical threat against my body)
"I didn't want to have you. I can kick you out any time I want, you piece of shit motherfucker"

It was just a solid stream of projection. She projected basically every negative trait she has onto me. My mother really truly thinks I'm some super-happy narcissist living in paradise while she suffers. Also, at one point, she wanted me to text my dad and manipulate him into buying her something, because she obviously can't do that herself.

At one point I finally lost it--she was combing through my hair really tightly and it was extremely painful, so I accused her of doing that on purpose to make me suffer. She said "maybe I am, motherfucker" with this smug "and there's nothing you can do about it" tone and I just screamed "FUCK YOU!" at her so loud my voice was hoarse within a minute. Hours later, it's still hoarse and I've been coughing and wheezing ever since. I really think I permanently damaged my voice from that.

To add insult onto injury she made dinner for my dad but not for me. I haven't eaten anything all day. Meh. I'll just make something later.
Nūdenku waga honji ma naku honyasi ne ika-ika ichamase!
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Honyasi zō honyasi ma naidasu.
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Re: I'm useless.

Post by qwed117 » 09 Aug 2016 01:52

First things first, I would highly recommend getting some form of audio recording the next time she does this. My suggestion is to hold your phone in your hand, set to record and then confront her.
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Re: I'm useless.

Post by HoskhMatriarch » 09 Aug 2016 03:42

qwed117 wrote:First things first, I would highly recommend getting some form of audio recording the next time she does this. My suggestion is to hold your phone in your hand, set to record and then confront her.
^

But be careful about what you say.
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Re: I'm useless.

Post by elemtilas » 09 Aug 2016 04:06

HoskhMatriarch wrote:
qwed117 wrote:First things first, I would highly recommend getting some form of audio recording the next time she does this. My suggestion is to hold your phone in your hand, set to record and then confront her.
^

But be careful about what you say.
True, but to be honest, it sounds like all he has to say is "good morning, Mother" and he could get hours worth of recordings. [:S]
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Re: I'm useless.

Post by Chagen » 18 Aug 2016 21:52

Ugh. College starts today. This marks the first/Fall semester of my third year.

Except I haven't even registered yet. Now, that's mainly because of financial issues and scrambling to get holds taken off of my account, but the truth of the matter is that I have no motivation to go to college right now. I need to put down some classes--registration is still ongoing for about a week or two--but...why? Why am I going to college? Why am I doing this?

I never talk to my parents about college. That's because I view it as nothing but sheer drudgery. I don't go to college because I enjoy it. I go because my parents demand it. I do like being in the classes and learning, but applying myself to finish assignments is near-impossible. I don't talk about college to the point that my dad seriously believes I never went to college in the first place, and that I'm pulling a fast one on my parents. Obviously that is ridiculous.

I can't keep hiding from them. My parents are grilling me more and more, and it's making me stressed out and filled with anxiety. I stopped talking about my classes a long while back, because my mom was always "you're wasting our money with that crap, take some real classes!" no matter what I picked. I don't even really have a major--I mean, yes, in my school's database I am working towards a major in Linguistics. But I don't really care about that. I've been getting by by just taking the generic required courses, except I'm running out of those and I still don't know what I want to major in. Why should I major in something? I have no skills, and getting a major in something which wont get me a good-paying career feels like a waste.

I do enjoy learning, and there's a lot of cool courses my university offers. I could say "fuck it", and put down some random stuff to learn for the sheer thrill of learning, but here's the thing: that costs money. I have already pissed away my college fund and taken more than 15,000 bucks in loans, and if I want to take classes I have to either keep shoveling money down a fucking infinite well or build debt which will make my life miserable.

This is to me one of the most infuriating hypocrisies of modern day universities. They posit themselves as places of learning--places where you go to expand your mind, educate yourself, and become a knowledgeable and productive member of society. But it's all a lie. They are nothing more than businesses which want your money. Only through bleeding yourself of every drop of money you own will you receive even the most minor scraps. All anyone but the most rich or the freakishly dedicated can do is take their major, since taking anything else results in thousands down the drain. At the end, you are shuffled along to either toil as an employee in your major's field, or you are cast aside and left to suffer in the suffocating grasp of poverty.

I already dread having to pay off loans later. With my non-existent skills, how am I supposed to feed and shelter myself (my parents sure wont let me be a deadbeat bum) and pay these bills? Am I damning myself to a life of exploitative labor, unable to afford even the most basic luxuries and distractions from the nightmarish grind? Am I going to have to live paycheck-to-paycheck, having to scrape together the cash for a simple video game because bills, food, rent, and loan debt leave me with pennies?

Is that living? Working solely to keep oneself alive, unable to enjoy living, believing earnestly that "one day, everything will be better", until one day you look at yourself and realize that it doesn't get better, and that there is no rational reason to continue this living hell?

If these are the "best" years of my life, then I might as well jump in front of a bus now, because it's only going downhill from here. I wish I could just tell my parents to give up and let me be a deadbeat NEET bum. But they'd never do it. So here I am, suffering in silence.
Nūdenku waga honji ma naku honyasi ne ika-ika ichamase!
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Honyasi zō honyasi ma naidasu.
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Re: I'm useless.

Post by k1234567890y » 19 Aug 2016 04:31

Chagen wrote:applying myself to finish assignments is near-impossible.
I do have this problem too...
Chagen wrote:Ugh. College starts today. This marks the first/Fall semester of my third year.

Except I haven't even registered yet. Now, that's mainly because of financial issues and scrambling to get holds taken off of my account, but the truth of the matter is that I have no motivation to go to college right now. I need to put down some classes--registration is still ongoing for about a week or two--but...why? Why am I going to college? Why am I doing this?

I never talk to my parents about college. That's because I view it as nothing but sheer drudgery. I don't go to college because I enjoy it. I go because my parents demand it. I do like being in the classes and learning, but applying myself to finish assignments is near-impossible. I don't talk about college to the point that my dad seriously believes I never went to college in the first place, and that I'm pulling a fast one on my parents. Obviously that is ridiculous.
looks like you have depression, and I think your parents want you to go to college because they think you are smart enough and they hope you get a better job...but anyways, poor Chagen...;-; (hug)

however, going to college in order to have a better job might have become a bad cycle: more people go to college in order to get get a better job after they graduate, however, the more people that have a college diploma, the less valuable the diploma is, and everyone ends up to be the same, they can't get a better job eventually, this has happened in the country I live...
Chagen wrote: Is that living? Working solely to keep oneself alive, unable to enjoy living, believing earnestly that "one day, everything will be better", until one day you look at yourself and realize that it doesn't get better, and that there is no rational reason to continue this living hell?
seems that this is the real life of most people in every country?
...

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Re: I'm useless.

Post by abi » 19 Aug 2016 10:50

Chagen wrote: I need to put down some classes--registration is still ongoing for about a week or two--but...why? Why am I going to college? Why am I doing this?
You could always take a semester off, it's not like your credits instantly dissolve or anything. Take some time to build up money and collect yourself.
Chagen wrote: But I don't really care about that. I've been getting by by just taking the generic required courses, except I'm running out of those and I still don't know what I want to major in. Why should I major in something? I have no skills, and getting a major in something which wont get me a good-paying career feels like a waste.

I already dread having to pay off loans later. With my non-existent skills, how am I supposed to feed and shelter myself (my parents sure wont let me be a deadbeat bum) and pay these bills? Am I damning myself to a life of exploitative labor, unable to afford even the most basic luxuries and distractions from the nightmarish grind? Am I going to have to live paycheck-to-paycheck, having to scrape together the cash for a simple video game because bills, food, rent, and loan debt leave me with pennies?
I also live in Texas and am going to college. Have you considered a teaching? I'm not familiar with universities other than the University of Texas system, but have you tried a teaching certification? My college offers money to get a teaching cert, in exchange you have to teach at a high needs school. After that's up you can pretty much go wherever you want, even out of state as teaching is always a high needs job. Some parts in DFW offer over $40k starting salary, especially for math and physics. It's not a glamorous life but it'll pay the bills.

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Chagen
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Re: I'm useless.

Post by Chagen » 22 Aug 2016 22:13

Parents wont let me stay a semester off. My dad thinks that only lazy people stay off, and my half-brother was a complete bum who dropped out college and did absolutely nothing with his life. My parents are now terrified of me becoming the same so they will never let me drop out for even a semester. Also, even if I did, I'm not sure I could endure the constant abusive harassment from my mom, who would spend every minute of her life screaming at me about how I'm a useless bum.

I'm pretty bad at teaching others...

I'm really sorry that it sounds like I'm just making excuses for everything you guys say, but that's just how my life is right now.

Also it turns out that school actually starts on the 23rd, not the 18th. Registration ends the 29th. I'm gonna half-heartedly throw down some classes, including one I flunked out of twice already (well, the second time I just quit in shame 3 weeks into the class...)
Nūdenku waga honji ma naku honyasi ne ika-ika ichamase!
female-appearance=despite boy-voice=PAT hold boy-youth=TOP very be.cute-3PL
Honyasi zō honyasi ma naidasu.
boy-youth=AGT boy-youth=PAT love.romantically-3S

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k1234567890y
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Re: I'm useless.

Post by k1234567890y » 23 Aug 2016 04:23

Chagen wrote:Parents wont let me stay a semester off. My dad thinks that only lazy people stay off, and my half-brother was a complete bum who dropped out college and did absolutely nothing with his life. My parents are now terrified of me becoming the same so they will never let me drop out for even a semester. Also, even if I did, I'm not sure I could endure the constant abusive harassment from my mom, who would spend every minute of her life screaming at me about how I'm a useless bum.

I'm pretty bad at teaching others...

I'm really sorry that it sounds like I'm just making excuses for everything you guys say, but that's just how my life is right now.

Also it turns out that school actually starts on the 23rd, not the 18th. Registration ends the 29th. I'm gonna half-heartedly throw down some classes, including one I flunked out of twice already (well, the second time I just quit in shame 3 weeks into the class...)
(hug Chagen)

Neurotypical people can't really empathize with people with mental issues like you sometimes, at least when they seem to have a normal or above general intelligence.

Also, your half brother may also have some mental issues?
...

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